What’s Love Without Resentment?

Welcome lady’s and gents , if you haven’t noticed the name of this blog is called The Good, The Bad and The Freaky. Lol yes the freaky! This is a blog dedicated 100% to sex, love and more sex. Not only will I be giving you the low down on my freaky escapades but some advice on the things I’ve encountered involving love and sex. So thanks for visiting my blog and I hope you enjoy!!

So previously I EXPOSED (haha) that I’ve gotten married. Now for you loving creatures, that isn’t a surprise. “People get married everyday foolish girl” is what I’m pretty sure a lot of you are thinking but nay nay. Your girl was not about that marriage life. I mean for what? For why? Why would I, ME, the sexiest mofo around (is what I tell myself, self confidence is THE best confidence) get married? Lets talk about feminism with a capital F that runs through my veins. Taking another mans last name, “serving & obeying” thy husband. I mean what the fuck. But then I met my husband & I didn’t have to uphold the normal standards of marriage because he was anything but normal LOL.

My husband believes in sharing the load of everything we do, except paying bills. I can stay at home & do nothing if that’s what I see fit. I guess what I’m trying to say is..there is wiggle room to be what I see fit. Be who I want to be. If I’m going through a hippie phase and feel like a bra was man made and a longtime ago our ancestors let their tits hang loose and be free. He’s there to support. Now that I have kind of painted an accurate picture of what my husband is in my life…let me fill you in on what’s troubling me as of late.

So, my husband is a military man. Which means he comes and goes with the wind. Leaving only minuet traces of his love and presence with me when he leaves.  I have been holding down the household by myself now for nearly three months. Not long, aye. Well I have about four more fucking months to go and I am NOT doing well. I am stressed. Worried about him but also I have my mentally ill mother & two teenage siblings to look after- that live two states away, might I add. There is so much emotional baggage I have to carry & since he’s been gone I haven’t had adequate support. The military teaches soldiers how to cold, sarcastic and sometimes downright emotionless. *Side note* its crazy to think emotions can be numbed in so short time of frames.

Any who, I am extremely lonely. I got married and lost all my friends (wtf is up with that because apparently that’s common). I do everything alone which would have been fine if I wasn’t married. The point of getting married was not to be alone forever. Even though I’m new to this military spouse life, I am already feeling the affects. I am even getting acquainted with a new emotion : RESENTMENT. I resent that he signed up for the military, that HE decided to sign up for the army but somehow I & our future children will suffer too. The military life gives him a rush and a thrill but its turns me into a nervous fucking wreck. Always frustrated, missing him & a bit confused. I (may) talk to him once a week. At one point I was getting 3 minute phone calls after not hearing from him for weeks.

Its not his fault…I know but how could he be ok with it all. I know he cant do anything about it because he signed a contract. Therefore my husband is government property for the next three years. I love him and its only temporary but goddamn is it hard. My life is controlled by the military and my husbands military status. Did I say I don’t sleep at night? Well, I don’t anymore. I hate this shit. But, how can I not support him. It makes him happy. He’s so fucking happy there. All the incredible men he’s met and how much he has grown is crazy. I see the changes in him & unfortunately I’ve always had the gift of reading situations & being right.

Welp in this situation I see myself being here supporting him, loving him, drifting wherever his career takes me but not being able to get that support back. Also I notice I cant comfort him when it comes to the military stuff. He bonds with other soldiers and doesn’t really open up to me about it. When I went to visit him he literally sat on the side of me quiet but when one of the other soldiers came by he became the him I know. I am battling with this emotion, big time. I read so much shit on the internet about former army spouses and the divorce rate and it is horrifying. The shit I complain about is the norm. The divorce rate is high, the rate of infidelity is high. Honestly I feel as though if he ever cheated it definitely be with a woman in the military because she understands his plight better than I could ever. I don’t know. The resentment takes over me sometimes. I want to rebel against the thoughts but they are there, always lingering in the dark parts of my mind.

What’s love without resentment? Perfection. But whoever said perfection was possible in a relationship has never truly been in love.

 

 

Let’s Play Catch Up…Me First

Welcome lady’s and gents , if you haven’t noticed the name of this blog is called The Good, The Bad and The Freaky. Lol yes the freaky! This is a blog dedicated 100% to sex, love and more sex. Not only will I be giving you the low down on my freaky escapades but some advice on the things I’ve encountered involving love and sex. So thanks for visiting my blog and I hope you enjoy!!

Well, well, well! Would you look who has decided to post again after three long goddamn years. Haha I’m pretty sure a lot of you kind folks are wonder where the hell I’ve been and lets just say everywhere but to a kind place LOL. No to catch up its been three years and I got married. Yes! Yes, I did! I married the best man I have ever met. He’s kind loving and he’s all mine.

Of course I have a sit load of love stories and even more freaky ones. If you love the vlog and your excited to its return. Wait no longer because we are back baby!

Ballon Fetish?!?

HELLOO beautiful people!! Today is Thursday and it is 11:48 p.m. and if your like me and most of the millions of other single people your usually on a porn stroll right now. You know trying to find the right video on PornHub that has the best angles, lighting and of course the subject matter that suits your fancy. Well tonight I found a category that was so baffling to me I found myself watching way more porn tonight than I intended to. The category happened to be fetishes, anything from feet to bodily fluids.

Needless to say I am a very curious person and now I am and was thoroughly grossed out. Now by far am I a judgmental person but man some of these videos were…..HORRIFYING! & Although the videos were out there, there was one topic in particular that really confused the hell out of me and that was BALLON FETISHES… I mean after ten minutes of watching I didn’t see how one could be aroused. I mean this is the first time I’ve ever heard of this, let alone ever seen a video about sexualizing balloons.

If you’ve never heard of this please you guys Google it, I am not joking it really is some comical shit.

Honestly the fact that I’m doing a blog on balloon fetishes says something about my sex life lol, but gosh dating in 2016 is hard. There are a shortage of good men and a even greater shortage of good lovers. With social media taking over I have resulted to online dating a couple times and UGH, that’s a blog for a different day!

Well loves I wish I had more info to tell you about but unfortunately I’m stumped. So if you your or someone you know has a balloon fetish or any fetish why don’t you let me know about it and maybe ill tell my about my own 😉

 

 

 

It Just Doesnt Compare…..

Welcome lady’s and gents , if you haven’t noticed the name of this blog is called The Good, The Bad and The Freaky, lol yes the freaky! This is a blog dedicated 100% to sex, love and more sex. Not only will I be giving you the low down on my freaky escapades but some advice on the things I’ve encountered involving love and sex. So thanks for visiting my blog and I hope you enjoy!!

Todays topic is: Can guys and girls really be friends?

What’s up you wildcats! I am uber excited to talk about this topic today. It has been widely debated for ages and today I want to share my experience with a friends with benefits *couch* sorry “friend”. So at the time I had been a very tumultuous relationship, it was very toxic and it seem endless. A close friend of mine who happened to be a guy hated my ex and always tried to get me away from him. I was very young and dumb and swore I loved my ex and that I wouldn’t find a guy better than him. One night there was a huge fight and I called my friend to pick me up. I told him what I had been going through as usual and he gave me the “your beautiful” speech. Instead of us hitting the bar, club or some scene that wasn’t close to a bridge or any sharp object we headed to his house. I was cool as long as there was alcohol to drown out my pain and music (preferably something I could cry to).

After about an hour of sobbing, drinking and joking we eventually started watching a movie. Now I know what your thinking, I should of known he was going to make a move. Here’s the thing we had known each other for 4 years and we had a brief fling in the beginning but nothing more. We were friends, best friends I was his wing man & he was my rock. Back to the story, we started to cuddle as always and he asked me ,” Do you think if we’d tried to make it work that you could of been happy with me. The question alone threw me because we’d never discussed feeling let alone those for each other.

I don’t know if its was the shots of moonshine and vodka, glass of hennessey or the beer in my system that made me do it but I did it……I KISSED HIM! Not like a peck either, a long passionate and deep kiss. The kind that makes your whole body tingle. It lead further, and at that moment it was more comforting than a kiss on the forehead. We had sex all night and feelings that I never knew I had for him arose. He held me the way I’ve always wanted to be held and didn’t care that I snored lol. For the first time I awoke and felt loved. He made feel free again. But, even in my hung-over haze I knew what we had just done was wrong, no matter how much it felt right.

I had a guy who I still loved, one that was toxic but he was mine still. I instant felt waves of regret that had just messed up such a beautiful friendship. I got up, put on my clothes and left. I didn’t bother to wake him or leave a note, what we had could never be. I returned home to a “boyfriend” who was very apologetic and every bit of toxic. After weeks we settled back into our normal routine of loneliness, isolation and resentment. That one night never left my mind. Life didn’t feel as it once did, when my boyfriend touched me it made me cringe. I had fallen in love with my best friend and I couldn’t bring myself to return his many missed phone calls.

After admitting to myself that my relationship had died I ended it. One night while browsing Facebook I stumbled upon his page. I messaged him not even paying attention to his relationship status or the many pictures of him and his new girlfriend . The message simply read “I’m sorry I ran away, you showed me what being loved felt and looked like and I couldn’t except it. I miss you like crazy but, I know my opportunity has passed. Enjoy her she’s beautiful and I wish you all the happiness in the world. I love you.”

4 years later he is now married with 2 beautiful babies and I have also moved on.

Needless to say he’s the one that got away and ,my stance on tonight’s topic is DONT DO IT! But hey that’s just me maybe you think differently, why not let me know and drop me a comment! & Remember lovebugs safe sex is also great sex!

Squirting 101

Hello lady’s & gent’s before I jump into tonight’s topic I want to say thank you for visiting my blog! In case you haven’t noticed  (I must state it again because It’s all merged together ☺️). The name of this beauty is The Good, The Bad & The Freaky! Yes the freaky! This blog is 100% dedicated to sex, love and more sex! I always encourage you wonderful people to practice safe sex and don’t be afraid to drop me a comment down below!

Now in the mist of my usual late night browse on the internet I came across a topic I thought would be perfect for discussion. The topic for tonight is SQUIRTING!

This topic is near and dear to my heart because I myself am a avid squirter. It’s something I have grown to be proud of because not every woman has done it. If you don’t know what squirting is (I’m wondering what century you have just escaped from) but in a nutshell its female ejaculation. Meaning if a woman’s G-Spot is stimulated enough she’ll ejaculate a clear, odorless liquid. The orgasm may range from a gushing, to shooting across the room. The act in its self feels like walking on clouds and is pure ecstasy but the topic is wildly disputed. Many scientists state that the fluid’s makeup is mostly urine and vaginal fluids. Some scientists claim that women who experience squirting are simply learning to release one set of muscles while contracting the bladder so they can release urine during orgasm. Check out this study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine for more information.

Well now that you know the “facts” I must speak my piece. I Am A Proud Squirter! Not because it’s something I’ve learned how to do and mastered but because I have no other choice (trust me I’ve tried not to do it). I would like to share the good and the bad of having such an incredible bedroom skill.

The good; of course you all know it’s stated to be one of the best feelings in the world. Your body pulsates, nipples harden and you feel like your unable to control the sensation of that orgasm ripping through your body. It’s something that is amazing because I myself never have to work hard for an orgasm. As long as I am turned on the ejaculation tends to happen, vaginally or by clitoral simulation. The act its self is something that some women embrace and others turn away from in shame.

The bad; It’s pee?! (Not that I think it is but as long as it’s on Google or an “expert” said so people will believe it) The stigma and the shame can sometimes make women not want to engage in any sexual acts. Example when I was 16 I lost my virginity, the guy (who was a little large for a newbie like myself) brought on my first orgasm. Long story short we were young and we both had never experienced such a thing. He was grossed out and managed to shame me about the fact that his brand new car seats were soaking wet. He dropped me of at my house and I never heard from him again. The first guy I fell in love with rejected me and called me a “freak” and that stuck with me all the way into adulthood. I didn’t understand my body and I truly thought something was wrong with me. I didn’t enjoy sex, I would try to avoid it at all cost. The few times I would have sex I wouldn’t allow myself to have an orgasm or get worked up (which was uncomfortable as hell might I add). It wasnt until years later (when I was 20) when I shared my “little secret” with a co-worker over drinks that I realized I could do something that most women couldn’t & NATURALLY. Not only could I achieve an orgasm, but I could have intoxicating, spine tingling ones over and over again.

I’m not an expert by far but I don’t think the medical community has an answer to the phenomenon. Theyre just recently learning about the G-Spot so, how could they make a clear assumption about what the fluid is let alone where it really comes from. Just browse the internet and there are so many medical experts that stand strongly on several different study’s and opinions. Which is fine they may never have a clear answer but in the sexual community it’s either viewed as disgusting or it becomes a goal to accomplish during sex rather than a focus on sexual pleasure. You don’t know how many times I’ve warned a guy right before sex that I’m a squirter, they’ll node excitedly until…..they’re soaking wet & now acting as though they’ve been casted as the main star in a PornHub flick. Then the next day they’re either pissed about their sheets or wanting some more. It’s a really baffling situation but I love it and it makes sex interesting! My question is have any of you experienced squirting first hand? If so, drop it down below I want to hear from you! Until next time remember you guys safe sex, is great sex!

Today’s Topic Is About What ?? 😧

Welcome lady’s and gents , if you haven’t noticed the name of this blog is called The Good, The Bad and The Freaky. Lol yes the freaky! This is a blog dedicated 100% to sex, love and more sex. Not only will I be giving you the low down on my freaky escapades but some advice on the things I’ve encountered involving love and sex. So thanks for visiting my blog and I hope you enjoy!!

Todays topic is: Is there such a thing as no strings attached?

Okay it was Monday and I was lying in bed all cuddled up with my doggie, I was just dozing off when my phone starts vibrating. So I roll over and look at the bright ass screen that nearly lazored my eyes out, and it’s (for kicks lets call him “Mighty Mouth” lol). I looked at the time and it’s 2:45 a.m , I’m aggravated but I figured sh!t I had a bad day a quick big O wouldn’t be so bad. So I answered it, and within 20 minutes I went from grandma to sexy kitten. He came in the house and IT WENT DOWN!!! Ladies I don’t call him Mighty Mouth for nothing, it’s like the guy has a PhD in tongue work. Any who 2 hours later we’re both showered and all is well, he was out the door and I was back in bed snoring like a newborn baby. Now I don’t have a problem with incredible sex with no strings attached, especially if the guy isn’t relationship worthy. Don’t get me wrong after 3 months of intoxicating sex I really liked him. But I wasn’t worried about a relationship because I figured he wasn’t right for me; let alone anyone. Anyway over the next couple days I go on with life normally. In my mind he’s every bit of a booty call to me as I am to him, so we never talk in the day time. It was now Thursday I was invited to a Halloween party the next day, so I ran into a sex shop in the French Quarter looking for the most whore-ish yet classy costume I could find. Browsing the isles I happened  to hear a familiar voice , when I turned to my left it was “Mighty Mouth” with another girl. I tried to move along (just to be nosy without him seeing me) and observe what was going on. Now the first thing I noticed was a damn ring on his finger which stunned the absolute sh!t out of me because I’d never seen a ring on his finger before. The second thing I noticed was that the same mouth that had nearly sucked the soul from my body early Monday morning was now kissing, his assumed wife. The third thing that popped into my head was I THOUGHT THIS LITTLE SHIT WAS INCAPABLE OF A STABLE RELATIONSHIP!!! I was pissed not just because he was probably married but because I really liked him. I mean I told myself countless amounts of times to get over him and that it wouldn’t ever work. So I gathered myself and walked over to them. Yall, if you could have seen how big his eyes got you would have sworn he was choking. Very politely I greeted him and the big faced lady. He grinned and introduced me to her as “his beautiful WIFE”. I tried to keep a smile and but now I had to be visibly upset because she asked me did we know each other. I proceeded to say ” yeah we used to be friends in college, I just seen him Monday and he couldn’t stop running his mouth”. We laughed and I touched her arm, but Brian you didn’t tell me your wife was so attractive. She backed away, I knew the statement would make her uncomfortable enough to walk away. Which she did and I drilled him like his ass was my man. I basically asked him why he was such a liar and a dog and his response was.. You never asked if I was married! I couldn’t believe it, I was so heated I walked out of the store without my costume.

My whole thing was, it wasn’t worth it. I had fallen for a guy who was just slinging the good wood in my direction. I was so blinded by sex I never stopped to ask him about the important crap about a person. He made me question the “flawless” friends with benefits theory. I mean I wonder what would of happened if he wasn’t married and we gotten into a relationship. Would it have been just about sex? It made me realize just how many people are unhappy in relationships RIGHT now and because they started off as “Friends With Benefits”. So the moral of my story is know the person your with and the only benefits your friends should give you are great company, love and support.

But that’s just my opinion.

Do you think different? Let me know, drop a comment about what you think of friends w/benefits down below. Thanks for reading and remember safe sex saves lives!